THEAUTHOR’SPREFACE
Ofallkindsofsatire,thereis
keine
nonesoentertaininganduniversallyimproving,asthatwhichisintroduced,asitwereoccasionally,inthecourseofaninterestingstory,whichbringseveryincidenthometolife,andbyrepresentingfamiliarscenesinanuncommonandamusingpointofview,investsthemwithallthegracesofnovelty,whilenatur
natureisappealedtoineveryparticular.Thereadergratifieshiscuriosityinpursuingtheadventuresofapersoninwhosefavourheisprepossessed;
heespouseshiscause,hesympathiseswithhiminhisdistress,hisindignationisheatedagainsttheauthorsofhiscalamity:
thehumanepassionsareinflamed;
thecontrastbetweendejectedvirtueandinsultingviceappearswithgreateraggravation,andeveryimpressionhavinga
doppelte
doubleforceontheimagination,thememoryretainsthecircumstance,andtheheartimprovesbytheexample.The
aufmerksamkeit
attentionisnottiredwithabarecatalogueofcharacters,butagreeablydivertedwithallthevarietyofinvention;andthevicissitudesoflifeappearintheirpeculiarcircumstances,openinganample
feld
fieldforwitandhumour.Romance,nodoubt,
verdankt
owesitsorigintoignorance,vanity,andsuperstition.InthedarkagesoftheWorld,whenamanhadrenderedhimselffamousforwisdomorvalour,hisfamilyandadherentsavailedthemselvesofhissuperiorqualities,magnifiedhisvirtues,andrepresentedhischaracterandpersonassacredandsupernatural.
Thevulgareasilyswallowedthebait,imploredhisprotection,andyieldedthetributeofhomageandpraise,eventoadoration;
hisexploitswerehandeddowntoposteritywitha
tausend
thousandexaggerations;theywererepeatedasincitementstovirtue;
divinehonourswerepaid,andaltarserectedtohismemory,fortheencouragementofthosewhoattemptedtoimitatehisexample;
andhencearosetheheathenmythology,whichisnootherthanacollectionofextravagantromances.
Aslearningadvanced,andgeniusreceivedcultivation,thesestorieswereembellishedwiththegracesofpoetry,thattheymightthebetterrecommendthemselvestothe
aufmerksamkeit
attention;theyweresunginpublic,atfestivals,fortheinstructionanddelightoftheaudience;
andrehearsedbeforebattle,asincentivestodeedsofglory.
Thustragedyandtheepicmusewere
geboren
born,and,intheprogressoftaste,arrivedatperfection.Itisno
wunder
wonderthattheancientscouldnotrelishafableinprose,aftertheyhadseensomanyremarkableeventscelebratedinversebytheirbestpoets;wethereforefindnoromanceamongthem
während
duringtheeraoftheirexcellence,es sei denn
unlesstheCyropædiaofXenophonmaybesocalled;anditwasnottillartsandsciencesbegantoreviveaftertheirruptionofthebarbariansintoEurope,thatanythingofthiskindappeared.
Butwhenthemindsofmenweredebauchedbytheimpositionofpriestcrafttothemostabsurdpitchofcredulity,theauthorsofromancearose,andlosingsightofprobability,filledtheirperformanceswiththemostmonstroushyperboles.
Iftheycouldnotequaltheancientpoetsinpointofgeniustheywereresolvedtoexceltheminfiction,andapplytothe
wunder
wonder,ratherthanthejudgment,oftheirreaders.Accordingly,theybroughtnecromancytotheiraid,andinsteadofsupportingthecharacteroftheirheroesbydignityofsentimentand
praxis
practice,distinguishedthembytheirbodilystrength,activity,andextravaganceofbehaviour.Althoughnothingcouldbemoreludicrousandunnaturalthanthefigurestheydrew,theydidnotwantpatronsandadmirers;
andtheworldactually
begann
begantobeinfectedwiththegeist
spiritofknight-errantry,whenCervantes,byaninimitablestück
pieceofridicule,reformedthegeschmack
tasteofmankind,representingchivalryintherightpointofview,andconvertingromancetopurposesfarmoreusefulandentertaining,bymakingitassumethesock,andpointoutthefolliesofordinarylife.ThesamemethodhasbeenpractisedbyotherSpanishandFrenchauthors,andbynonemoresuccessfullythanbyMonsieurLeSage,who,inhisAdventuresofGilBlas,hasdescribedtheknaveryandfoiblesoflife,withinfinitehumourandsagacity.
ThefollowingsheetsIhavemodelledonhisplan,takingmeliberty,
jedoch
however,todifferfromhimintheexecution,whereIthoughthisparticularsituationswereuncommon,extravagant,orpeculiartothecountryinwhichtheszene
sceneislaid.ThedisgracesofGilBlasare,forthemostpart,suchas
eher
ratherexcitemirththancompassion;hehimself
lacht
laughsatthem;andhistransitionsfromdistresstohappiness,oratleastease,aresosudden,that
weder
neitherthereaderhastimetopityhim,norhimselftobeacquaintedwithaffliction.Thisconduct,inmyopinion,notonlydeviatesfromprobability,butpreventsthatgenerousindignation,whichoughttoanimatethereaderagainstthesordidandviciousdispositionoftheworld.
Ihaveattemptedtorepresentmodestmeritstrugglingwitheverydifficultytowhichafriendlessorphanisexposed,fromhisownwantof
erfahrung
experience,aswellasfromtheselfishness,envy,malice,andbaseindifferenceofmankind.Tosecureafavourableprepossession,Ihaveallowedhimtheadvantagesofbirthandeducation,whichintheseriesofhismisfortuneswill,Ihope,engagetheingenuousmorewarmlyinhisbehalf;
andthoughIforesee,thatsomepeoplewillbeoffendedatthemeanscenesinwhichheis
verwickelt
involved,Ipersuademyselfthatthejudiciouswillnotonlyperceivethenecessityofdescribingthosesituationstowhichhemustofcoursebeconfined,inhislowestate,butalsofindentertainmentinviewingthosepartsoflife,wherethehumoursandpassionsareundisguisedbyaffectation,ceremony,oreducation;andthewhimsicalpeculiaritiesofdispositionappearas
natur
naturehasimplantedthem.ButIbelieveIneednottroublemyselfinvindicatinga
praxis
practiceauthorizedbythebestwritersinthisway,someofwhomIhavealreadynamed.Everyintelligentreaderwill,atfirstsight,perceiveIhavenotdeviatedfrom
natur
natureinthefacts,whicharealltrueinthemain,althoughthecircumstancesarealteredanddisguised,toavoidpersonalsatire.ItnowremainstogivemyreasonsformakingthechiefpersonageofthisworkaNorthBriton,whicharechieflythese:
Icould,atasmallexpense,bestowonhimsucheducationasIthoughtthedignityofhisbirthandcharacterrequired,whichcouldnotpossiblybeobtainedinEngland,bysuchslendermeansasthe
natur
natureofmyplanwouldafford.Inthenextplace,Icouldrepresentsimplicityofmannersinaremotepartofthekingdom,withmoreproprietythaninanyplacenearthecapital;
andlastly,thedispositionoftheScots,addictedtotravelling,justifiesmyconductinderivinganadventurerfromthatcountry.
APOLOGUE
Ayoungpainter,indulgingaveinofpleasantry,sketchedakindofconversationpiece,representingabear,anowl,amonkey,andanass;
andtorenderitmorestriking,humorous,andmoral,distinguishedevery
figur
figurebysomeemblemofhumanlife.Bruinwasexhibitedinthegarbandattitudeofanold,toothless,drunkensoldier;
theowlpercheduponthe
griff
handleofacoffee-pot,withspectacleonnase
nose,seemedtocontemplateanewspaper;andtheass,ornamentedwithahugetie-wig(which,
jedoch
however,couldnotconcealhislongears),satforhisbild
picturetothemonkey,whoappearedwiththeimplementsofpainting.Thiswhimsical
gruppe
groupaffordedsomemirth,andmetwithallgemeine
generalapprobation,untilsomemischievouswaghintedthatthewhole—wasalampoonuponthefriendsoftheperformer;aninsinuationwhichwasnosoonercirculatedthanthoseverypeoplewhoapplaudeditbefore
begannen
begantobealarmed,andeventofancythemselvessignifiedbytheseveralfiguresofthepiece.Amongothers,aworthypersonageinyears,whohadservedinthe
armee
armywithreputation,beingincensedatthesupposedoutrage,repairedtothelodgingofthepainter,andfindinghimathome,“Harkye,Mr.Monkey,”saidhe,“Ihaveagoodmindtoconvinceyou,thatthoughthebär
bearhaslosthisteeth,heretainshispaws,andthatheisnotsobetrunken
drunkbuthecanperceiveyourimpertinence.”“Sblood!
sir,thattoothlessjawisad—nedscandalouslibel—butdon’tyou
vorstellen
imaginemesochopfallenasnottobeabletochewthecudofresentment.”Herehewasinterruptedbythearrivalofalearnedphysician,who,advancingtotheculpritwithfuryinhisaspect,exclaimed,“Supposetheaugmentationoftheass’searsshouldprovethediminutionofthebaboon’s—nay,seeknottoprevaricate,for,bythebeardofAesculapius!
thereisnotonehairinthisperiwigthatwillnotstandupinjudgmenttoconvicttheeof
persönlichen
personalabuse.Dobutobserve,
kapitän
captain,howthispitifullittlefellowhascopiedtheverycurls—thecolour,indeed,isdifferent,butthentheform
formandforetoparequitesimilar.”Whilehethusremonstratedinastrainofvociferation,avenerablesenatorentered,andwaddlinguptothedelinquent,“Jackanapes!”
criedhe,“IwillnowlettheeseeIcanreadsomethingelsethananewspaper,andthatwithoutthehelpofspectacles:
hereisyourownnoteofhand,sirrah,formoney,whichifIhadnotadvanced,youyourselfwouldhaveresembledanowl,innotdaringtoshowyourfacebyday,youungratefulslanderousknave!”
Invaintheastonishedpainterdeclaredthathehadnointentiontogiveoffence,ortocharacteriseparticularpersons:
theyaffirmedtheresemblancewastoopalpabletobeoverlooked;
theytaxedhimwithinsolence,malice,andingratitude;
andtheirclamoursbeingoverheardbythepublic,the
kapitän
captainwasabear,thedoctoranass,andthesenatoranowl,tohisdyingday.Christianreader,Ibeseechthee,inthebowelsoftheLord,rememberthisexample“whilethouartemployedintheperusalofthefollowingsheets;
andseeknottoappropriatetothyselfthatwhichequallybelongstofivehundreddifferentpeople.
Ifthoushouldstmeetwithacharacterthatreflectstheeinsomeungraciousparticular,keepthyowncounsel;
CHAPTERI
OfmyBirthandParentage.
Iwas
geboren
borninthenorthernpartofthisunitedkingdom,inthehouseofmygrandfather,agentlemanofconsiderablefortuneandinfluence,whohadonmanyoccasionssignalisedhimselfinbehalfofhiscountry;andwasremarkableforhisabilitiesinthelaw,whichheexercisedwithgreatsuccessinthe
station
stationofajudge,particularlyagainstbeggars,forwhomhehadasingularaversion.Myfather(hisyoungestson)fallinginlovewithapoorrelation,wholivedwiththeoldgentlemaninqualityofahousekeeper,espousedherprivately;
andIwasthefirstfruitofthat
ehe
marriage.Duringherpregnancy,adreamdiscomposedmymothersomuchthatherhusband,tiredwithherimportunity,atlastconsultedahighlandseer,
dessen
whosefavourableinterpretationhewouldhavesecuredbeforehandbyabribe,butfoundhimincorruptible.Shedreamedshewasdeliveredofatennis-ball,whichthedevil(who,tohergreat
überraschung
surprise,actedthepartofamidwife)strucksoforciblywitharacketthatitdisappearedinaninstant;andshewasforsometimeinconsolableforthelostofheroffspring;
when,allonasudden,shebehelditreturnwithequalviolence,andentertheearth,beneathherfeet,whence
sofort
immediatelysprangupagoodlybaum
treecoveredwithblossoms,thescentofwhichoperatedsostronglyonhernervesthatsheawoke.Theattentivesage,aftersomedeliberation,assuredmyparents,thattheirfirstbornwouldbeagreattraveller;
thathewouldundergomanydangersanddifficulties,andatlastreturntohisnativeland,wherehewouldflourishinhappinessandreputation.
Howtrulythiswasforetoldwillappearinthesequel.
Itwasnotlongbeforesomeofficiouspersoninformedmygrandfatherofcertainfamiliaritiesthatpassedbetweenhissonandhousekeeperwhichalarmedhimsomuchthat,afewdaysafter,hetoldmyfatheritwashightimeforhimtothinkofsettling;
andthathehadprovideda
spiel
matchforhim,towhichhecouldinjusticehavenoobjections.Myfather,findingitwouldbe
unmöglich
impossibletoconcealhissituationmuchlonger,franklyownedwhathehaddone;andexcusedhimselffornothavingaskedtheconsentofhisfather,bysaying,heknewitwouldhavebeentonopurpose;
andthat,hadhisinclinationbeen
bekannt
known,mygrandfathermighthavetakensuchmeasuresaswouldhaveeffectuallyputthegratificationofitoutofhispower:headded,thatnoexceptionscouldbetakentohiswife’svirtue,birth,
schönheit
beauty,andgoodsense,andasforfortune,itwasbeneathhiscare.Theoldgentleman,whokeptallhispassions,
außer
exceptone,inexcellentorder,heardhimtoanendwithgreattemper,andthencalmlyasked,howheproposedtomaintainhimselfandspouse?Hereplied,hecouldbeinnodangerofwantingwhilehisfather’stendernessremained,whichheandhiswifeshouldalwayscultivatewiththeutmostveneration;
andhewaspersuadedhisallowancewouldbesuitabletothedignityandcircumstancesofhisfamily,andtotheprovisionalreadymadeforhisbrothersandsisters,whowerehappilysettledunderhisprotection.
“Yourbrothersandsisters,”saidmygrandfather,“didnotthinkitbeneaththemtoconsultmeinanaffairofsuchimportanceasmatrimony;
neither,I
nehme an
suppose,wouldyouhaveomittedthatpieceofpflicht
duty,hadyounotsomesecretfundinreserve;tothecomfortsofwhichIleaveyou,withadesirethatyouwillthisnightseekoutanotherhabitationforyourselfandwife,whither,inashorttime,IwillsendyouanaccountoftheexpenseIhavebeenatinyoureducation,withaviewofbeingreimbursed.
Sir,youhavemadethegrandtour—youareapolitegentleman—averyprettygentleman—Iwishyouagreatdealofjoy,andamyourveryhumbleservant.”
Sosaying,heleftmyfatherina
situation
situationeasilyimagined.However,hedidnotlonghesitate;
for,beingperfectlywellacquaintedwithhisfather’sdisposition,hedidnotdoubtthathewasgladofthispretencetogetridofhim;
andhisresolvesbeingasinvariableasthelawsoftheMedesandPersians,heknewitwouldbetonopurposetoattempthimbyprayersandentreaties;
sowithoutanyfartherapplication,hebetookhimself,withhisdisconsolatebedfellowtoafarm-house,whereanoldservantofhismotherdwelt:
theretheyremainedsometimeina
situation
situationbutilladaptedtotheeleganceoftheirdesiresandtendernessoftheirlove;whichneverthelessmyfatherchosetoendure,ratherthansupplicateanunnaturalandinflexibleparentbutmymother,foreseeingtheinconveniencestowhichshemusthavebeenexposed,hadshebeendeliveredinthisplace(andherpregnancywasveryfaradvanced),withoutcommunicatingherdesigntoherhusband,wentindisguisetothehouseofmygrandfather,hopingthathertearsandconditionwouldmovehimtocompassion,andreconcilehimtoaneventwhichwasnowirrecoverablypast.
Shefoundmeanstodeceivetheservants,andgetintroducedasanunfortunatelady,whowantedtocomplainofsomematrimonialgrievances,itbeingmygrandfather’sparticularprovinceto
entscheiden
decideinallcasesofscandal.Shewasaccordinglyadmittedintohispresence,where,discoveringherself,shefellathisfeet,andinthemostaffectingmannerimploredhisforgiveness;
atthesametimerepresentingthedangerthatthreatenednotonlyherlife,butthatofhisowngrandchild,whichwasabouttoseethelight.
Hetoldherhewassorrythattheindiscretionofherandhissonhadcompelledhimtomakeavow,whichputitoutofhispowertogivethemanyassistance;
thathehadalreadyimpartedhisthoughtsonthatsubjecttoherhusband,andwassurprisedthattheyshoulddisturbhis
frieden
peacewithanyfartherimportunity.Thissaid,heretired.
Theviolenceofmymother’safflictionhadsuchaneffectonherconstitutionthatshewas
sofort
immediatelyseizedwiththepainsofchildbed;andhadnotanoldmaidservant,towhomshewasverydear,affordedherpityandassistance,atthehazardofincurringmygrandfather’sdispleasure,sheandtheinnocentfruitofherwombmusthavefallenmiserablevictimstohisrigourandinhumanity.
Bythefriendshipofthispoorwomanshewascarrieduptoagarret,and
sofort
immediatelydeliveredofamanchild,thestoryofdessen
whoseunfortunatebirthhehimselfnowrelates.Myfather,beinginformedofwhathadhappened,
flog
flewtotheembracesofhisdarlingspouse,andwhileheloadedhisoffspringwithpaternalembraces,couldnotforbearsheddingafloodoftearsonbeholdingthedearpartnerofhisheart(forderen
whoseeasehewouldhavesacrificedthetreasuresoftheeast)stretcheduponaflockbed,inamiserablewohnung
apartment,unabletoprotectherfromtheinclemenciesoftheweather.Itisnottobe
angenommen
supposedthattheoldgentlemanwasignorantofwhatpassed,thoughheaffectedtoknownothingofthematter,andpretendedtobeverymuchsurprised,whenoneofhisgrandchildren,byhiseldestsondeceased,wholivedwithhimashisheirapparent,acquaintedhimwiththeaffair;hedeterminedthereforetoobservenomedium,but
sofort
immediately(onthethirddayafterherdelivery)sentheraperemptoryordertobegone,andturnedofftheservantwhohadpreservedherlife.Thisbehavioursoexasperatedmyfatherthathehadrecoursetothemostdreadfulimprecations;
andonhisbarekneesimploredthat
Himmel
Heavenwouldrenouncehimifeverheshouldforgetorverzeihen
forgivethebarbarityofhissire.Theinjurieswhichthisunhappymotherreceivedfromherremovalinsuchcircumstances,andthewantofnecessarieswhereshelodged,togetherwithhergriefandanxietyofmind,soon
warfen
threwherintoalanguishingdisorder,whichputanendtoherlife.Myfather,wholovedhertenderly,wassoaffectedwithherdeaththatheremainedsixweeksdeprivedofhissenses;
während
duringwhichtime,thepeoplewherehelodgedcarriedtheinfanttotheoldmanwhorelentedsofar,onhearingthemelancholystoryofhisdaughter-in-law’sdeath,andthedeplorableconditionofhisson,astosendthechildtonurse,andheorderedmyfathertobecarriedhometohishouse,wherehesoonrecoveredtheuseofhisreason.Ob
Whetherthishardheartedjudgefeltanyremorseforhiscrueltreatmentofhissonanddaughter,or(whichismoreprobable)wasafraidhischaracterwouldsufferintheneighbourhood,heprofessedgreatsorrowforhisconducttomyfather,dessen
whosedeliriumwassucceededbyaprofoundmelancholyandreserve.Atlengthhedisappeared,and,notwithstandingallimaginableinquiry,couldnotbeheardof;
acircumstancewhichconfirmedmostpeopleintheopinionofhishavingmadeawaywithhimselfinafitofdespair.
CHAPTERII
Igrowup—amhatedbymyRelations—senttoSchool—neglectedbymyGrandfather—maltreatedbymyMaster—seasonedtoAdversity—IformCabalsagainstthePedant—amdebarredAccesstomyGrandfather—huntedbyhisHeir—IdemolishtheTeethofhisTutor.
Therewerenotwantingsomewhosuspectedmyunclesofbeingconcernedinmyfather’sfate,onthesuppositionthattheywouldallshareinthepatrimonydestinedforhim;
andthisconjecturewasstrengthenedbyreflectingthatinallhiscalamitiestheyneverdiscoveredtheleastinclinationtoservehim;
but,onthecontrary,byalltheartificesintheirpower,fedhisresentmentandsupportedhisresolutionofleavinghimtomiseryandwant.
Butpeopleofjudgmenttreatedthisinsinuationasanidlechimera;
because,hadmyrelationsbeensowickedastoconsulttheirinterestbycommittingsuchanatrocious
verbrechen
crime,thefateofmyfatherwouldhaveextendedtometoodessen
whoselifewasanotherobstacletotheirexpectation.Meanwhile,Igrewapace,andasIstronglyresembledmyfather,whowasthedarlingofthetenants,Iwantednothingwhichtheirindigentcircumstancescouldafford:
buttheirfavourwasaweakresourceagainstthejealousenmityofmycousins;
whothemoremyinfancypromised,conceivedthemoreimplacablehatredagainstme:
andbeforeIwassixyearsofage,hadsoeffectuallyblockadedmygrandfatherthatIneversawhimbutbystealth,whenIsometimesmadeuptohischairashesattoviewhislabourersinthe
feld
field:onwhichoccasionhewouldstrokemyhead,bidmebeagoodboy,andpromisetotakecareofme.
Iwassoonaftersenttoschoolata
dorf
villagehardby,ofwhichhehadbeendictatortimeoutofmind;butasheneverpaidformyboard,norsuppliedmewith
kleidung
clothes,books,andothernecessariesIrequired,myconditionwasveryraggedandcontemptible,andtheschoolmaster,who,throughangst
fearofmygrandfather,taughtmegratis,gavehimselfnoconcernabouttheprogressImadeunderhisinstruction.Inspiteofallthesedifficultiesanddisgraces,IbecameagoodproficientintheLatintongue;
and,assoonasIcouldwritetolerably,pesteredmygrandfatherwithletterstosuchadegreethathesentformymaster,andchidhimseverelyforbestowingsuchpainsonmyeducation,tellinghimthat,ifeverIshouldbebroughttothegallowsforforgery,whichhehadtaughtmetocommit,mybloodwould
liegen
lieonhishead.Thepedant,whodreadednothingmorethanthedispleasureofhispatron,assuredhishonourthattheboy’sabilitywasmore
verdanken
owingtohisowngeniusandapplicationthantoanyinstructionorencouragementhereceived;that,althoughhecouldnotdivesthimoftheknowledgehehadalreadyimbibed,
es sei denn
unlesshewouldempowerhimtodisablehisfingers,heshouldendeavour,withGod’shelp,topreventhisfutureimprovement.And,indeed,hepunctuallyperformedwhathehadundertaken;
for,onpretencethatIhadwrittenimpertinentletterstomygrandfather,hecausedaboardtobemadewithfiveholesinit,throughwhichhethrustthefingersandthumbofmyrighthand,andfasteneditbywhipcordtomywrist,insuchamanneraseffectuallydebarredmetheuseofmypen.
ButthisrestraintIwasfreedfrominafewdays,byan
unfall
accidentwhichhappenedinaquarrelbetweenmeandanotherboy;who,takinguponhimtoinsultmypoverty,Iwassoincensedathisungenerousreproachthatwithonestrokewithmy
maschine
machineIcuthimtotheskull,tothegreatterrorofmyselfandschoolfellows,wholefthimbleedingontheboden
ground,andrantoinformthemasterofwhathadhappened.Iwassoseverelypunishedforthistrespassthat,wereItolivetothe
alter
ageofMethusalem,theimpressionitmadeonmewouldnotbeeffaced;themorethantheantipathyandhorrorIconceivedforthemercilesstyrantwhoinflictedit.
Thecontemptwhichmyappearancenaturallyproducedinallwhosawme,thecontinualwantstowhichIwasexposed,andmyownhaughtydisposition,impatientofaffronts,involvedmeina
tausend
thousandtroublesomeadventures,bywhichIwasatlengthinuredinadversity,andemboldenedtoundertakingsfarüber
abovemyyears.Iwas
oft
ofteninhumanlyscourgedforcrimesIdidnotcommit,because,havingthecharacterofavagabondinthedorf
village,everypieceofmischief,dessen
whoseauthorlayunknown,waschargeduponme.IhavebeenfoundguiltyofrobbingorchardsIneverentered,ofkillingcatsIneverhunted,of
stehlen
stealinggingerbreadInevertouched,andofabusingoldwomenIneversaw.Nay,astammeringcarpenterhadeloquenceenoughtopersuademymasterthatIfiredapistolloadedwithsmallshotintohis
fenster
window;thoughmylandladyandthewholefamilyborewitnessthatIwasabedfastasleepatthetimewhenthisoutragewascommitted.
Iwasoncefloggedforhavingnarrowly
entkommen
escapeddrowning,bythesinkingofaferryboatinwhichIwaspassenger.Anothertime,forhavingrecoveredofabruiseoccasionedbya
pferd
horseandcartrunningoverme.Athirdtime,forbeingbittenbyabaker’sdog.
In
kurz
short,whetherIwasguiltyorunfortunate,thecorrectionandsympathyofthisarbitrarypedagoguewerethesame.Farfrombeingsubduedbythisinformalusage,myindignationtriumphedoverthatslavishawewhichhadhithertoenforcedmyobedience;
andthemoremyyearsandknowledgeincreased,themoreIperceivedtheinjusticeandbarbarityofhisbehaviour.
Bythehelpofanuncommongenius,andtheadviceanddirectionofourusher,whohadservedmyfatherinhistravels,Imadeasurprisingprogressintheclassics,writing,andarithmetic;
sothat,beforeIwastwelveyearsold,Iwasallowedbyeverybodytobethebestscholarintheschool.
Thisqualification,togetherwiththeboldnessoftemperandstrengthofmakewhichhadsubjectedalmostallmycontemporaries,gavemesuchinfluenceoverthemthatI
begann
begantoformcabalsagainstmypersecutor;andwasinhopeof,beingabletobidhimdefianceinaveryshorttime.
Beingattheheadofafaction,consistingofthirtyboys,mostofthemofmyown
alter
age,Iwasdeterminedtoputtheirmettletotrial,thatImightknowhowfartheyweretobedependedupon,beforeIputmygrandschemeinexecution:withthisview,weattackedabodyofstoutapprentices,whohadtakenpossessionofapartofthegroundallottedtousfortheschemeofourdiversions,andwhowerethenplayingatninepinsonthespot;
butIhadthemortificationtoseemyadherentsroutedinaninstant,anda
bein
legofoneofthembrokeinhisflucht
flightbythebowl,whichoneofouradversarieshaddetachedinpursuitofus.Thisdiscomfituredidnothinderusfromengagingthemafterwardsinfrequentskirmishes,whichwemaintainedby
werfen
throwingstonesatadistance,whereinIreceivedmanywounds,thescarsofwhichstillremain.Ourenemiesweresoharassedandinterruptedbythesealarmsthattheyatlastabandonedtheirconquest,andleftustothepeaceableenjoymentofourownterritories.
Itwouldbeendlesstoenumeratetheexploitsweperformedinthecourseofthisconfederacy,whichbecametheterrorofthewholevillage;
insomuchthat,whendifferentinterestsdividedit,oneofthepartiescommonlycourtedtheassistanceofRoderickRandom(bywhichnameIwas
bekannt
known)tocastthebalance,andkeeptheoppositefactioninawe.Meanwhile,Itooktheadvantageofeveryplay-daytopresentmyselfbeforemygrandfather,towhomIseldomfoundaccess,byreasonofhisbeingcloselybesiegedbyanumerousfamilyofhisfemalegrandchildren,who,thoughtheyperpetuallyquarrelledamongthemselves,neverfailedto
verbinden
joinagainstme,asthecommonfeind
enemyofall.Hisheir,whowasabouttheageofeighteen,mindednothingbutfox-hunting,andindeedwasqualifiedfornothingelse,notwithstandinghisgrandfather’sindulgenceinentertainingatutorforhimathome;
whoatthesametimeperformedtheofficeofparishclerk.
ThisyoungActaeon,whoinheritedhisgrandfather’santipathytoeverythingindistress,neversateyesonmewithoutuncouplinghisbeagles,andhuntingmeintosomecottageorother,whitherIgenerallyfledforshelter.
InthisChristianamusementhewasencouragedbyhispreceptor,who,nodoubt,tooksuchopportunitiestoingratiatehimselfwiththerising
sonne
sun,observing,thattheoldgentleman,nach
accordingtothecourseofnatur
nature,hadnotlongtolive,forhewasalreadyonthevergeoffourscore.CHAPTERIII
MyMother’sBrotherarrives—relievesme—aDescriptionofhim—hegoesalongwithmetotheHouseofmyGrandfather—isencounteredbyhisDogs—defeatsthem,afterabloodyEngagement—isadmittedtotheoldGentleman—aDialoguebetweenthem.
Aboutthistimemymother’sonlybrother,whohadbeenlongabroad,lieutenantofaman-of-war,arrivedinhisowncountry;
wherebeinginformedofmycondition,hecametoseeme,andoutofhisslenderfinancesnotonlysuppliedmewithwhatnecessariesIwantedforthe
gegenwart
present,butresolvednottoleavethecountryuntilhehadprevailedonmygrandfathertosettlesomethinghandsomeforthezukunft
future.Thiswasatasktowhichhewasbynomeansequal,beingentirelyignorant,notonlyofthejudge’sdisposition,butalsoofthewaysofmeningeneral,towhichhiseducationonboardhadkepthimanutterstranger.
Hewasa
stark
strongbuiltman,somewhatbandylegged,withahals
necklikethatofabull,andafacewhich(youmighteasilyperceive)hadwithstoodthemostobstinateassaultsoftheweather.His
kleid
dressconsistedofasoldier’scoatalteredforhimbytheship’stailor,astripedflanneljacket,apairofredbreechesspannedwithpitch,cleangrayworstedstockings,largesilverbucklesthatcoveredthree-fourthsofhisschuhe
shoes,asilver-lacedhat,whosecrownoverlookedthebrimsaboutaninchandahalf,blackbobwiginbuckle,acheckshirt,asilkhandkerchief,ahanger,withabrasshandle,girdedtohisthighbyafurnishedlacebelt,andagoodoakplantunderhisarm
arm.Thusequipped,hesetoutwithme(whobyhisbountymadeaverydecentappearance)formygrandfather’shouse,whereweweresalutedbyJowlerandCaesar,whommy
cousin
cousin,youngmaster,hadletlooseatourapproach.Beingwellacquaintedwiththeinveteracyofthesecurs,Iwasabouttobetakemyselftomyheels,whenmyuncleseizedmewithonehand,brandishedhiscudgelwiththeother,andatone
schlag
blowlaidCaesarsprawlingontheboden
ground;but,findinghimselfattackedatthesametimeintherearbyJowler,andfearingCaesarmightrecover,hedrewhishanger,wheeledabout,andbyaluckystrokeseveredJowler’sheadfromhisbody.
Bythistime,theyoungfoxhunterandthreeservants,
bewaffnet
armedwithpitchforksandflails,werecometotheassistanceofthedogs,whomtheyfoundbreathlessuponthefeld
field;andmycousinwassoprovokedatthedeathofhisfavourites,thatheorderedhisattendantstoadvance,andtakevengeanceontheirexecutioner,whomheloadedwithallthecursesandreproacheshisangercouldsuggest.
Uponwhichmyunclesteppedforwardswithanundauntedair,atthesightof
dessen
whosebloodyweaponshisantagonistsfellbackwithprecipitation,whenheaccostedtheirleaderthus:.“Lookee,brother,yourdogshavingboardedmewithoutprovocation,whatIdidwasinmyowndefence.
Soyouhadbestbecivil,andletusshootahead,clearofyou.”
Ob
Whethertheyoungsquiremisinterpretedmyuncle’sdesireoffrieden
peace,orwasenragedatthefateofhishoundsbeyondhisusualpitchofresolution,Iknownot;buthesnatchedaflailfromoneofhisfollowers,andcameupwithashowofassaultingthelieutenant,who,puttinghimselfinapostureofdefence,proceededthus:
“Lookee,youlubberlysonofaw—e,ifyoucomeathwartme,’wareyourgingerbreadwork.
I’llbefoulofyourquarter,d—nme.”
Thisdeclaration,followedbyaflourishofhishanger,
schien
seemedtochecktheprogressoftheyounggentleman’scholer,who,lookingbehindhim,perceivedhisattendantshadslunkintothehouse,shutthegate,andlefthimtoentscheiden
decidethecontentionbyhimself.Hereaparleyensued,whichwasintroducedbymycousin’sasking,“Whothedevilareyou?
Whatdoyouwant?
Somescoundrelofaseaman,Isuppose,whohasdesertedandturnedthief.
Butdon’tthinkyoushall
entkommen
escape,sirrah—I’llhaveyouhang’d,youdog,Iwill.Yourbloodshallpayforthatofmytwohounds,youragamuffin.
Iwouldnothavepartedwiththemtosaveyourwholegenerationfromthegallows,youruffian,you!”
“Noneofyourjaw,youswab—noneofyourjaw,”repliedmyuncle,“elseIshalltrimyourlacedjacketforyou.
Ishallrubyoudownwithanoakentowel,myboy,Ishall.”
Sosaying,hesheathedhishanger,andgraspedhiscudgel.